Weighted Blanket of Prayer

How God Stays With Me Since I Visited Heaven

Welcome new readers, followers and subscribers! I am happy you are here.

I have occasionally felt God’s presence in unique ways through my Christian walk, but never as close as after I visited Him in heaven. For a week or so after my return, I literally felt Him WITH me as I walked around the house. His warmth never left. I would walk into the kitchen and He followed - a presence I felt - my best friend and my confidant. This makes sense to me. I needed to recover and even though my experience was very positive, I am assured by the professionals that it was still traumatic. Recovery took a lot of time. Longer than a week but I feel Jesus knew I needed His extra support during that time. It helped me not miss Him so badly.

After returning, when I sat down to study His Word or when I lay in bed at night, going into deep prayer, I felt His joy at finally being able to meet with me after my long day. Did you know that He waits patiently to meet with us? This poignant realization hit me pretty hard. All those days I never met with him throughout my life…He was waiting for me. And what about the days that my time with Him was rushed? Sigh. I shall choose to not focus on how I made Him wait and instead focus on how to keep doing better.

After I went to heaven and returned here, my prayer time changed too. He meets me as I pray and I compare the feeling to a weighted blanket. I’ve never actually used one but I imagine it is much like this. He envelops me. Often I am in bed, but not always. If I am sitting, it is a heavy warmth on my shoulders. I have, at times, felt pressed to go to my knees (ouch). Wherever I am, He settles around me as I pray.

There is warmth. There is also deep relaxation. My drama teacher in high school would have us lay on the stage and close our eyes. We would then proceed to focus and relax each part of our body as we listened to him. “Relax each toe…slowly. Let the weight and warmth move to your ankles…then to your knee.” And so forth. It’s a practice I’ve occasionally done when I’ve had a hard time getting to sleep. Although this exercise is the closest activity I can compare it to, meeting with Jesus is even more relaxing than that. Each muscle relaxes as I pray and (I often lay on my side), I even feel my organs in my body (weird, I know!) settle down to mattress level. A true shift of the innards.

There have been times I’ve missed my blanket and I’ve learned then to look for and confess any sin in my life (Isaiah 59:2). Then I feel my Lord’s blanket once more.

I’ve had some anxiety issues due to my past unhealthy relationships, but it appears God may have healed that in my time with Him. I’ve since had four plane rides (2 by myself!) without my usual angst and panic attacks. Even with turbulance. Yesterday, I was in a situation that usually gives me anxiety and I kept waiting for it but it never came. Another way He is showing me that He is close.

God gives me physical signs as well, as I am sure He does in your life. I think of when we were in O’ahu and I was on the balcony of our room, praying for the people of O’ahu and the oppression/abuse I see there. When I looked up from these intense prayers, I discovered that He had sent a rainbow to the cove. I could see from end-to-end. As I started trembling and tears washed down my cheeks, He doubled it. He sent me the same this morning in our small Oregon town. These kinds of experiences remind me of His faithfulness and often leave me in awe as I remember visiting the heavenlies and learning how very much He values us and our work here on earth.

Listen to me, O coastlands, and give attention, you peoples from afar. The Lord called me from the womb, from the body of my mother he named my name. He made my mouth like a sharp sword; in the shadow of his hand he hid me; he made me a polished arrow; in his quiver he hid me away. And he said to me, “You are my servant, Israel, in whom I will be glorified.” But I said, “I have labored in vain; I have spent my strength for nothing and vanity; yet surely my right is with the Lord, and my recompense with my God.” And now the Lord says, he who formed me from the womb to be his servant, to bring Jacob back to him; and that Israel might be gathered to him— for I am honored in the eyes of the Lord, and my God has become my strength— ... Isaiah 49:1-5 (ESV)